Grief

In this lifetime, we will all cry because of death. You will cry for others and they too, will cry for you. Because the living know, a day will come when they will die.

Vanessa Moonkie

Death is alikened to a scorpion sting . The pain is unbearable. It almost feels like a movie, so unreal that someone was right next to you in one moment and in the next they’re only found in pictures. It baffles the mind and breaks the heart that the person you spent so much time with does not exist anymore anywhere in the world.

The bible records two sisters who lost their brother [Ref John 11] after they had notified Jesus. The word of God says even mourners gathered at their home, like they do wherever there’s a funeral , to comfort them. The one Jesus loved died. The ones you love will die too. I only shared the story about my Daddy but he’s not the only one l lost to the scorpion of death, people I loved dearly, whom I cannot ring right now. We will lose each other just like someday, others will lose you.

Jesus grieved for Lazarus. He wept. ”Jesus wept.“ ‭‭John‬ ‭11‬:‭35‬ ‭NIV‬‬ https://bible.com/bible/111/jhn.11.35.NIV WHY? Because the heart responds to pain through tears. People who don’t cry are only building up a bomb inside. The day it explodes it will have turned to more than pain but anger and bitterness. We cry when we are hurt. “Men don’t cry” is a wordly statement that has destroyed many people emotionally. Jesus , cried. Tears streamed down his face, he felt the pain , he expressed the pain. Not expressing the pain doesn’t mean you’re strong. Not crying doesn’t mean you are healing, it may mean you are afraid, to face your feelings.

I am so sorry you lost a parent, family, a friend, a spouse, a colleague . I am so sorry they had to leave so soon. I am sorry for the pain you’ve had to carry inside, the tears you’ve cried, the panic attacks because suddenly you remembered they’re not there anymore, the battle to stay in faith after all that. I am sorry. It will not heal you or stitch your brokenness but May it feel like a hug. Many of us have died with the people we loved. The day we buried them, we also buried ourselves. We have refused to grieve and let go. This leads to depression. This has led to suicide. This has stagnated many people, why? Because if we choose to stop, God cannot force us to move. He will raise Lazarus if they show him the grave. And maybe we refuse to heal because we feel we would have betrayed the dead, they will feel like we didn’t love them if we forgot. The truth is, the dead know and feel nothing. They cannot even see that you’re crying, if they did, would they not wake up from the coffin? This is harsh truth but my darling, they are gone. ”For the living know that they will die, but the dead know nothing; they have no further reward, and even their name is forgotten.“ ‭‭Ecclesiastes‬ ‭9‬:‭5‬ ‭NIV‬‬ https://bible.com/bible/111/ecc.9.5.NIV

I have so much to say on this topic so we will continue with it. Today I want you to understand three things

[1] they are gone

[2] face the facts, cry, express yourself, don’t bottle up the pain

[3] you must move on, choosing to stay by the grave is not showing them loyalty, it is stagnating us .

God knows. God understands. Job lost all his children, he grieved. How could it be? Why? God why we ask! But the answer is, all men will one day leave this world. Them, you and myself. We fool ourselves if we ignore this truth. If you’d like to talk to me about your experience and you need help, please do send me an email . For now, approach our Lord, cry if need be , be intentional about your healing. It is possible to be healed from grief.