yielded

My name is Vanessa. People call me many names, l literally can’t even count how many names I’ve been given. Everyone’s so creative when someone’s name starts with letter V . I like to be called V of The Most High God. It’s a name l got from one of the biggest battles of my life. Infact , it was a battle to live or die. My sanity, my life, depended on a daily confession of this name. I confessed it from fear to boldness, from anxiety to health. With every confession, my mind locked in on something that I can never get over , my identity in Christ. My reference/anchor for this name is from Genesis‬ ‭14‬:‭19‬ ‭KJV‬‬ “And he blessed him, and said, Blessed be Abram of the most high God, possessor of heaven and earth:”

I had decided to not write anything about myself for the August blogs because I am always writing and I wanted to hear from other women but it’s very important that as the visionary of Yielded Center I also bring my story. I don’t even know why l started with the name thing but l suppose it’s because that is when my journey with God really started. I mean it started when l got saved but I think God was on a journey with me but l wasn’t walking. I wasn’t moving. I was not on the journey with Him. It took so much ; I even get chills thinking about how l got here. I will take a few seconds to clap for Holy Spirit and myself for tag teaming so well ! 🤗🌸 (l literally did it!)

I’m writing about the Yielded Woman. The one who was once very stubborn. I was a stubborn child. What I was to people, l was to God. So there’s people who are bad to people and nice to God, they are two faced. I wasn’t like that. I was one faced. God also got the same version l gave to people; stubborn , strong-willed, very hotheaded. The most worked on part of a believer is the heart and mind. If we think we are yielded and we have disconnected the heart and mind, we are joking. A big fat joke. For a believer to be flexible in the hands of God, he/she must give up their “own” mind and “own” heart and get transformed into the version that allows Holy Spirit to lead them and they actually FOLLOW.

So the year that brought me to my knees was 2020. I know many people have financial wounds from that year. Some got depression and since then they haven’t recovered. Other people are still grieving those they lost. It was a dark time but the spirit was still hovering upon us as in the book of Genesis 1. God cannot be cast out of the earth, He is the landlord ,so He was still here just like in the beginning. I found myself awake sometimes 24hrs or more because every time I tried to sleep, I saw dreadful visions. I saw knives. I saw mad people. I saw crowds of evil people seeking my life. I got insomnia, lost my appetite, had migraines daily and l had great fear. The fear crippled me that I couldn’t even go outside, if I did I’d turn so much Incase those “people” see me and chase after me. I wasn’t comfortable at home or outside. Everywhere I was, I didn’t want to be there. The day I went back to church, when the gatherings began , I remember going out during the service because l had a massive panic attack , so massive I couldn’t breathe, l didn’t like the presence of God anymore and a voice said to me , “GO OUT NOW!” I hated crowds. I told one of my brothers there to please help me pray outside. He prayed for me and the spirit left me. I went back in. The devil was after my life but the battle was breaking me to make me.

This story is quite long but I’ll just shorten it by saying , that memory stayed with me and I didn’t know that what the enemy meant for evil, God would turn it around for my good. The journey of yielding starts sometimes with trials. Ever read about Hannah? Every time she went to Shiloh she had a request – a son but she returned without a son until she yielded her womb. Yes you can yield your body parts. You can give them up to Holy Spirit. Lord have my eyes. Lord l yield my ears. In all honesty, I’m still on the journey and sometimes l find myself battling flesh vs spirit. Yielded people or yielding people must learn how to control the flesh. They must learn how to control their words, their actions, thoughts, everything. You cannot yield when you cannot surrender. It doesn’t work like that.

“Let me emphasize this: As you yield to the dynamic life and power of the Holy Spirit, you will abandon the cravings of your self-life.”
‭‭Galatians‬ ‭5‬:‭16‬ ‭TPT‬‬

The vision of The Yielded Center is simple; it is to teach people how to live a spirit led life. We are all in the class. I even repeat classes because I fail sometimes but yielding also means accepting correction and not running away. Accept it and stay to learn more and become better. There’s so much God wants to do in the life of a yielded woman. Deborah yielded. Mary yielded. I already mentioned Hannah. Manoah’s wife. The fav for singles – Ruth. Rebekah too. When you surrender to God there’s no need to war for somethings because they’re given to the yielded. There’s a package only given to the yielded. There’s money for the yielded because God can trust that you’ll not go club hopping with His money. I have so much to say 🥹 but we will break it down next week when we are back with our usual yielded blogs.

The yielded woman - A woman already surrendered to God. She may make mistakes but she is Dead to self and only living for God.

The yielding woman - the one who is on the journey. Still doubts and changes her mind often; Stumbles here and there but is actively participating and walking with Holy Spirit to become

The woman - the one who is just living for themselves. They care nothing about Holy Spirit or transformation. You cannot be this woman. Refuse it.

In closing, the journey doesn’t end. Even in heaven. Adam and Eve were to yield even in Eden. If you will be with us in heaven, start learning this now so that you don’t Eve us later. I hope this has helped you to understand somethings. The crushing times are producing a better you. Don’t give up. When you make a mistake arise again. Take correction . Don’t make it hard for yourself, ask Holy Spirit for help. Have conversations with Him. Above all, be flexible. I love you. Thank you for reading. 🩷

Hey family. I love you. Are you okay? How’s your heart? How’s your mind? Let’s reflect together. Here’s the mirror.

This is many of us right now. The first thing you see when you look into the mirror is “oh I’ve many pimples,” or “l don’t have the perfect nose,” or maybe “I wish I looked like this or that,” we focus on what we could’ve been more than what we are or what is. The Apple is whole. Looks beautiful and instead of seeing that in the mirror , the reflection is that of an ugly Apple, eaten up (whoever ate that apple was fighting – maybe it’s Eve). But what if I told you that’s many of us right now. Looking at our selves all we see is the bad so much so that even the good doesn’t look so good anymore. Do you see the you that has done his/her best or do you only see the failure?

Do you ever reflect on the good things? Do you ever sit and think about the battles you’ve won? The good decisions you made? The awards you won or the achievements you’ve had thus far? The small and big wins like finishing school? Buying your car? Like keeping yourself holy even when the flesh is screaming for attention? Do we ever look back and say , “Vanessa I’m proud of you?!” Say it to yourself. Don’t rush it. Say it slowly . Intentionally. Loud if you want to!

One of the causes of depression and anxiety especially in the last months of the year is that people only choose to reflect on what hasn’t been done. As much as that is important to realign us with purpose ; when are we going to also celebrate what needs to be celebrated? I looked at my vision board for 2024 and my darling , 70% hasn’t been done. Most of it is literally beyond my control. I had two days of sitting in the dust thinking about my age, the remaining months, what I’ve done with the sermons my Apostle has taught and that I’ve heard all year , I cried. I encouraged others but I was discouraged but on the flip side – man I’m proud of myself!

Celebrating your small wins doesn’t mean we’re encouraging smallness – always remember that excellence is also achieved by falling, stumbling, learning and rising up! Think about it – you got the certificate. You paid the rent. You bought the house. Things you didn’t or couldn’t do in 2023 you did them. I’m reflecting even on Yielded Blogs ! Every win must be celebrated! I celebrate the fact that people take their precious time to read these blogs, do you know how many “unread” messages people have on their WhatsApp?

I’m proud of you. Tired but showing up. Not sure how things will happen but still praying! What a game changer! What a boss! I don’t care what the devil has been telling you but I’m here to remind you, it’s not all bad. Step back and re-center if you ever find yourself overthinking and beating yourself up over things that went wrong. The point of introspection isn’t judgment and condemnation. I’ve a couple of questions that I want us to answer ;

1. List 10 things that you have achieved this year (even if it’s as “small” as getting a free online certificate) clap for yourself .
2. Say I’m proud of myself 5 times! (I said 5 not 2)
3. What words do you need to hear the most right now? Now open your mouth, say them to yourself. If you always wait for people to clap for you , you may have to wait a long long time.
4. Post a picture of yourself and write this caption , l can do all things through Christ who strengthens me. You can tag me on Instagram or yielded tv.
5. What 10 words would you use to describe yourself? (eg I’m beautiful; I’m hardworking)
6. Revisit your vision board and do some declarations and prayer .

Pity parties don’t help anyone. Even the bible talks about how David would encourage himself in the Lord. “My friends are like this and that!” But how are you to yourself? Before looking at expectations from others, do you value you? Do you look in the mirror and see the positive or does someone have to keep reminding you ? Remember, fix the negatives and work hard but also identify the positives and celebrate!! You are not where you used to be!

See you on Monday with our last 4 blogs of the women’s month after which we will be back with our Yielded Blogs. Have a beautiful weekend!

“Those who go out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with them.”
‭‭Psalms‬ ‭126‬:‭6‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Cont :Interview with Oboitshepo Tladi

Hello family. My apologies for posting late today. Today we’re continuing with our Journey to Purity Interview with Sistwr Oboitshepo Tladi . Since it’s chilled Thursday , you can get your coffee/tea and let’s learn together!

11. How do you stay encouraged and motivated in your commitment, especially during difficult times?

I remind myself that God’s will is always the safest place to be! So I would rather face difficulty while being in the will of God- then face difficulty outside of the will of God.

12. Are there any misconceptions about purity that you would like to address?

Purity is not about suppressing or ignoring sexual desires – it is about redirecting them and using that energy to honour God. It’s about recognising that the Lord has given you the gift of your body and the desires that come with it. These desires are not inherently evil, so I tend to remind myself that what my body feels is not the sin, instead what I choose to do with those feelings is what can either honour God or dishonour Him. For example, in the beginning of my faith journey whenever I would feel tempted, I would choose to either paint or go out for a walk. We can choose to redirect the pint up energy through being artistic or being physically active. Release the energy! Purity is a mental journey as much as it is a spiritual one.

13. What’s your take on purity rings? Are they biblical? Do they help in maintaining your purity walk? If so, in what ways?

Uhmm I am not against purity rings, I believe to some extent they are biblical. We see in the Old Testament that people were encouraged to write down the laws and precepts of God on their forearms using bands, ondoorposts and even on their gates (see Deuteronomy 6:6-9). They were encouraged to use these everyday objects as reminders of God’s word. So, if someone feels like having a purity ring is the best way to keep themselves accountable, since it stands as a reminder then I think they should totally go for it. I think purity rings and purity necklaces are a good step in the right direction. They can stand as a constant reminder of our call to purity.

Deutoronomy 6:6-9 NIV

“These commandments that I give you today are to be on your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.”

14. What’s the difference between purity and holiness?

Holiness is what God gives to us and in turn purity is what we give to Him.

15. Does celibacy equate to purity?

Nope! Not at all. Many religions and practices promote celibacy. The ability to abstain from sexual activity does not make us sexually pure at all. However, our celibacy as Christians turns into a pursuit of purity once we do it in order to obey God, separate ourselves from the world, allow the Lord to cleanse our hearts, and create an environment within us that the Holy Spirit can dwell.

16. How do we as believers overcome temptations and urges that seem to be too strong?

The best advice I can give someone who is struggling with a strong temptation is:

A) Be devoted to prayer and spending time in the presence of God

B) Be honest and tell the Lord exactly what you need and exactly what you are struggling with.

I remember in the beginning of my journey, when I decided to take this walk seriously, I decided to keep it real with God. I would tell God that I am struggling with sexual sin because quite frankly I enjoy it, however the consequences of it are heartbreaking. I told God just how weak I felt in this area and then asked Him to show me why I should walk away from this sin. I asked Him to give me a deeper understanding of just how defiling porn, masturbation, and fornication was.

I believe the Lord honoured this prayer because it was honest and raw. So keep it real with the Lord. Tell Him that you desperately need His grace and His help in this area. He hears the cries of His children.

17. If one struggles with an impure desire how do they break free from that? Is there a need for deliverance?

There is always a need for deliverance, I say this because I believe that the process of sanctification is truly never ending. However, if there is an issue of impure desires, chances are there is a need for deliverance but on the other hand it is possible that it is an issue of learning how to renew the mind and resist the enemy. I am also a firm believer in praying for yourself. A lot of the deliverance I received was from taking time to fast, to pray, and to seek God for myself. I believe that God Himself can encounter us and deliver us all we need to do is position ourselves for it.

18. Is anyone exempted from the journey to purity?

This is a journey we are all called to, whether young or old, single or married. We are all called to sexual purity and moral purity. So, no one is exempt. We are called to pursue purity and honor God with our lives.

19. Why is it called the journey to purity ? Can’t we just find ourselves there once we receive Jesus?

I call it a journey to purity because it is a journey. As I said before, the process of sanctification is a never ending one. I believe that to be true for purity as well. The Lord is constantly working on us and cleansing us and conforming us to the image of His Son. It is only when we cross over into eternal glory that we will finally be able to say that we are as pure and perfect as Jesus is. But as long as we are still on the earth, it remains a journey. There are moments of this process where the Lord is dealing with what we do with our bodies, thenthere are moments He begins to deal with the posture of our hearts and thoughts, and then He goes on to deal with our characters and then there are seasons where He is dealing with our speech– and this is a process that goes on and on. We mature and we learn that purity is layered and therefore a journey.

20. The world mocks the church for its purity, what advice would you give to someone who is going through peer pressure from friends , family, coworkers to engage in some activities that are not in accordance to scripture? 

Disregard the shame! Make an intentional decision to ignore it! There is a reward in disregarding the shame of the world. They know not what they do.

21. Is there anything else you'd like to share about your experiences and how they have shaped your faith and life?

I have come to learn that a purity journey that does not acknowledge the goodness of sex and sexuality is an incomplete one. As I said, SEXUAL PURITY IS NOT ABOUT SUPPRESSING YOUR DESIRES, IT’S ABOUT REDIRECTING THEM! And practicing this has helped me a lot.

What does this mean? It means allowing the Lord to not only strengthen our self-control but also allowing Him to renew our language and mindset around our sexuality and sexual desires.

Most of the time when we are on this journey, we tend to have so much guilt attached to our past that when our bodies respond in some kind of way, we immediately dub it as sin. However, I want us to instead consider that maybe you’re feeling the way you’re feeling, simply because it’s normal to feel that way. It’s not because it is some spiritual attack of any kind or because you haven’t received deliverance, but simply because you are a human having a human experience. Now, I am in no way saying that the enemy does not attack us in this way, because we all know that he does BUT I want to put an end to us being silenced and condemned for feelings and emotions that are completely normal and okay. If we don’t do this, we’ll find ourselves going around in circles with the enemy, trying to fight a battle that has already been won!

Part of this journey to purity is about changing the narrative and realising the beauty and goodness of sex and even our sexual desires. There is a freedom we receive when we recognise these feelings as part of Gods purpose for our lives, which we will one day understand and explore in marriage. When we approach our sexualities in this manner, freely and openly offering it to the Lord, the enemy loses power, because he only holds power the longer he is able to contaminate and pervert what is good and holy.

I want to suggest that the next time you feel some kind of way, instead of assuming that it is an attack on your purity or before you start feeling guilty and sinful – get into prayer but change the narrative: 

“Jesus, I thank you that the way I am feeling is not sinful or dirty. My body is functioning the way you have designed it. Feeling aroused is not a sin, the sin is what I do with those feelings, and I am choosing to redirect them and speak to You, oh Lord. I pray that if the enemy is trying to open any door of sin or temptation through this feeling, I shut that door in Jesus’ Mighty name, but I come out of any type of guilt or condemnation the enemy wants to attach to me. I also repent for any thought or door I may have opened. I dedicate my sexual desires and feelings to you because they belong to You, they are good and are given to me by You! I will honor You with them! Thank You for giving me the spirit of self-discipline and self-control. AMEN!”

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Interview with Zinhle

Question: Can you share a bit about your childhood and the circumstances that led to growing up without a mother?

Answer: At the age of 4years , mom chose relationship over her own biological kids. She left and never looked back and sadly in the process my dad passed away as he was the only parent standing. The Queen who adopted me stepped in and she tried to fill up that motherly gap but still there was that void in me that longed for that motherly love that I never had to experience. Back then I couldn’t understand why I had to go through unfavourable conditions.

Question: How did not having a present mother affect your upbringing?

Answer: It affected me big time. I believe I was robbed a beautiful childhood because I was longing that one day I might be reunited with that one person who had became a stranger. I remember some days I will see some women passing and think what if that person is my mom. I had lots of questions on why was I brought in this planet to face rejection. It took me a while to find a sense of belonging, as many kids would be talking about their experiences with their moms and I had nothing to share.

Question: Who were the significant figures or role models in your life during your childhood?

Answer: My Aunty the beautiful Queen who had to take care of me during the last days of my father’s life. She raised me well and I will be forever indebted to her. She taught me Ubuntu, kindness and Hard-work. She laid out the good foundation. She is my role model, from her I learnt that we are here on this planet to serve and kindness is something that can be learned.

Question: How did your faith play a role in helping you cope with the absence of your mother?

Answer: During my teenage years it affected my faith because I believed that God had His own favourites but now that I’m surrounded with many believers I now see it as a blessing and I believe that everything happened for a good reason which God foresaw from the beginning. I love the book of Jeremiah where it says I Knew You before you were born, what I draw from this scripture it shifts the whole atmosphere and it changes everything about how I had perceived myself.

Question: What challenges did you face growing up without a mother?

Answer: Trying to fit in one was of the challenges I faced. Growing up I had to lie always about the whereabouts of her and at times I would say she passed away instead of answering questions which I didn’t have answers for. I had to pretend like all was well but deep down there was that child in me screaming for answers.

Question: In what ways did other women in your life, such as relatives or mentors, influence your spiritual and personal growth?

Answer: Women in my life have played a Huge role in my influence, spiritual journey and my personal growth, they made it easier for me to walk boldly In this beautiful journey called life. From my surrounds I get to learn that you cannot do this life thing in isolation you need a community that will cheer you up or that will pull you up when you are down as like if full of difference phases that we get to experience.

Question: Were there any particular Bible verses, Christian teachings, or church experiences that brought you comfort?

Answer: For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future. ‘” — Jeremiah 29:11.
This scripture was the answer to the thousands questions I had. I found comfort in the promises of God.

Question: Did you ever question your faith due to the absence of your mother, and how did you reconcile those feelings?

Answer: yes countless times, I guess my faith was tested and dwelling in the word of God changed the whole narrative.

Question: What advice would you give to others who are growing up without a parent, particularly a mother?

Answer: My advice will be: Remember that other things are out of your control. Trust in the Lord and allow God to lead you, and other questions will be answered in Heaven so strive by all beens to make it to heaven.

Question: Do you have moments of feeling alone, envying those with their mothers?

Answer: Yes I do believe we all experience loneliness moments, I call it rollercoaster emotions. I don’t envy anyone with a parent but I am striving to be a better mom to my daughter.

Question: Have you healed from this or does it still affect you

Answer: I believe so, for me to share it without shedding any tears. I am living in acceptance era moments.

Question: Is there anything else you'd like to share about your journey and how it has influenced your faith and life perspective?

Answer: My journey has taught be about the power of forgiveness and Faith. The First Step to Healing is Forgiving and Letting Go of anger. Forgiving others, not because they deserve forgiveness, but because you deserve. Forgiveness is the final form of love. I forgive myself and set myself free.

Editor’s note

What I’ve learned from this is, be a present parent. Mothers be present. Fathers be present. It goes beyond money. Be intentional about building a relationship with your children. The average adult has childhood traumas caused by many parental factors. No man or woman is worth you abandoning your children. They will not be kids forever , the time given to you to groom them is actually very limited considering the world is already setting the standards for them. We pray for all those who have experienced neglect and rejection. The stone that the builders rejected has now become the chief cornerstone!

Fast forward to when I started my monthly period . I struggled because l had no pads so l had to use an old cloth. I started dating at a very young age so she can get food and other stuff for us. I then came to S.A to look for greener pastures . When l got here l started working as a maid. My boss was so abusive that I did not last 3 months with her. After leaving this job I began to go to church, l prayed everyday believing that God will change my life. This was my everyday prayer ;

“God please change my situation i don't want to remain poor for the rest of my life.

I had one pair of shoe (pumps) . I didn’t even have any toiletries and it really was too much for me to handle.

BUT GOD! God changed my life in a way that until today I look back and say ,”This is how far the Lord has brought me.”
Words of encouragement to anyone in that situation never stop believing. Never stop praying. There is a God in heaven who answers prayer. Looking at my life right now I see God and His mercy. I am a mother to two beautiful children and a wife to one husband, by God’s grace l am alive and well! Here’s a picture of me;

Editor’s note

May God heal every orphan from the pain of losing their parents. You are actually not an orphan. You have a Father. God loves you. I lead a prayer group called the Midnight Prayer Group , we often do outreach at orphanages. To partner with us; send us a dm by clicking the highlighted link . You can donate groceries, toiletries, uniforms, etcetera. Help someone today . ❤️