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Studying Bible Characters

Dealing with rejection II

She conceived again, and when she gave birth to a son she said, “Because the Lord heard that I am not loved, he gave me this one too.” So she named him Simeon. Again she conceived, and when she gave birth to a son she said, “Now at last my husband will become attached to me, because I have borne him three sons.” So he was named Levi.”
‭‭Genesis‬ ‭29‬:‭33‬-‭34‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Hey family . I got so much feedback from yesterday’s post ,we praise God.

Leah thought Sons and daughters could make her worthy. We live in societies where the barren woman is seen as one not worthy for marriage. If she is married , relatives find a way to break it to bring in another woman who is worthy because her womb can carry children. A woman’s worth is not in her ability to give birth. No. Her worth is in Christ alone. It is through Christ that her womb will open.

We can see her Leah’s shattered hopes because each time she conceives a son with Jacob, she pins her future happiness on them. It’s as if they’re objects or a means to access Jacob’s heart. If not marital love, surely children would complete her. Leah wanted recognition from her husband. She wanted to be seen by him but he doesn’t see her. When we had the Mental Health Event I mentioned that every human being wants to be seen. Both male and female, the rich and poor, children and adults, everyone wants to be seen, acknowledged and validated. Nobody wants to feel like a nonentity or nonexistent. We all want to be where we are loved , seen and accepted.

Leah was still living in hope that though she could not attract Jacob with her beauty, she could attract him through her fertility. To some , they know they can’t attract any man using virtuous means so they attract through dressing in a certain way and doing certain things. It’s all over social media. “Dance a certain way and get the man you want.” Or “reveal a little more skin , show it to the world and have the world’s attention.” During the Ownership Conference Apostle Michael even addressed men saying ,”Some lick their lips a certain way, dress a certain way, shave their beard a certain way, not because they must want to look good but the motive is to lure women.” Why do you do what you do? Who are you doing it for? People do too much to be seen, accepted and validated. Leah gives Jacob sons but he doesn’t give her love.

Jacob was sexually intimate with Leah but emotionally and spiritually detached. A 1995 survey asked the following question: “Have you ever had sex with a woman you have actively disliked?” 58% of men answered “yes“ . I bet since then the numbers went up. Leah is desperately seeking attachment. One of the differences between men and women is that men want physical contact, women want emotional intimacy. Once you cut of the communication, the woman will feel a detachment. If you remove the physical intimacy, the man will feel a detachment. Jacob was getting what was his love language but Leah remained empty because her own cup was not filled. This is the reality of many marriages.

But what will make you feel seen? Graduating? Getting married? Will you be content when they finally say “l feel the same way too?” Will you be happier if you bought a new car and everyone sees that surely you can also do big things? Is it Many more children? Is it more money? When will we be content? When will we stop looking to people or things for completion? Some people romanticise the rejection. We speak of it so much and create a pity party atmosphere but when are we going to break out of that mindset? One person rejected you not the whole world and certainly not Jesus! Stop acting like the whole world has rejected you because of one person who didn’t even know your worth. If you don’t stop and reflect, you’ll be like Leah, her body became a tool to make her feel “worthy”. You don’t have to use your body to be seen as a worthy woman, you don’t have to use muscles or money to be seen as a worthy men. The people who truly are for you will not have you seeking validation. Rachel never had to do what Leah did. Others aren’t begging for it, they’re simply being themselves.

Rejection breeds insecurity which breed inadequacy and low self esteem which also breeds a yearning that can turn to obsession or idolising. Leah sought Jacob’s love and validation but over time she realised her worth didn’t depend on Jacob but on her relationship with God. Her journey shows us we don’t need outside the validation to show us our worth. Let them go on and choose who they want to choose, you are already chosen.

By God 💗

Categories
The Overcoming Believer

Dealing with rejection

“Leah became pregnant and gave birth to a son. She named him Reuben, for she said, “It is because the Lord has seen my misery. Surely my husband will love me now.”
‭‭Genesis‬ ‭29‬:‭32‬-‭NIV‬‬

Happy new week family. I hope you are keeping well and still believe that we are going to finish strong this 2024! We are almost through with the Leah series then we will study another bible character. Let’s go!

There is something very touching about Leah’s life. She strikes as a woman of sorrow. A woman who lost herself in the shadows of rejection and trying to fit in. I see low-self esteem. Isn’t it amazing? That love gives us confidence and boldness? It boosts our self esteem to know that we are loved and accepted. There’s a way you’ll walk, talk, pose that shows positiveness. At this point God has seen what is happening in Jacob’s household. God surely knows what’s happening in every house hold. Yes, the abusive uncle? The absent mother? The dramatic sibling 😂 ? That there was no food yesterday. The wild parties that we sometimes have in families. The unfairness? The gossip? Even the things that happen behind our walls are seen . Let’s always remember that. God who gave us eyes to see , can also see.

Jacob, even though he did not love Leah, still was willing to have sex with her. I mean!!! I thought he’d get busy with Rachel only. This demonstrates a principle that is still true, that a man will often be willing to have sex completely apart from love. We live in a generation that confuses sex for love or vice versa. This is actually one of the biggest problems common to everyone in every nation because lust is not tribalistic or racist. Sex is not proof of love. Most times it is proof of lust and lust is a spirit that takes and keeps taking.

Leah was not the first, nor the last, to live under this problem of male nature. This is not to slander men or incite feminism. Even the males know of this and many of them actually acknowledge that some of the ladies they got together with, it had nothing to do with love. Only a foolish woman regards the willingness to have sex as proof of love. So Jacob rightfully so, has sex with his wife and she gets pregnant. Sometimes people know that the person does not love them but they give their bodies anyways. Rejection can make people so vulnerable to even accept the unacceptable because they really wish to fill a gap. The gap that only love can fill.

Leah must’ve been excited to have a son moreover, a son for Jacob. I mean this is the man who spins her world around. Surely she’d be ecstatic about sharing this beautiful bond with him. She names the boy Rueben and she says something interesting , “Surely my husband will love me now.” I gave him something surely he will love me. I gave her money, surely she will marry me. I gave him my body surely I’m the only woman in his life. I check up on them more than anyone, they will choose me. I have sacrificed so much for them, they will surely acknowledge me. If God gave us Christ and people still reject Him , how are we so sure that giving or gifting something to someone automatically makes us their priority? You can give and give and never get anything back.

Leah hoped the new baby would cause him to love her but Jacob did not see things the way she did. His love could not be bought even by a son. Leah is expressing her unfulfilled desire of gaining her husband’s affection through childbearing. Another lesson, having children for him will not trap him to marry or love you. Buying her wigs and paying her fees will not emotionally trap her into saying yes l do! People always do what they want to do because they have a will. People choose who they want to choose . Let them. It’s sad isn’t it? You could give your all and get nothing. God gave Leah a son for her own happiness but she missed her moment of gratitude by fixing her eyes on Jacob.

If you’re dealing with rejection I want you to know, no matter how much you try to make them love you, they won’t because love is not by force. Accept that it is not you that they have chosen. Am l saying hate them? No. But do not hate yourself so much that you squeeze yourself in places and rooms that cringe at your presence. I will tell you who chooses you all day everyday though,,,

His name is Jesus Christ.💗

Categories
The Overcoming Believer

Chilled Thursday

Hey family. I don’t have much to say today lol but I’d like to give us a tweensy weensy piece of advice that my Dad shared. “Learn something new everyday.” It may be through listening to a podcast or reading a book or simply listening to your leader or mentor . Refuse to carry old information daily. I’ve realised that transformation happens daily to those who yield to the principles. Even Facebook type bar asks you What’s New? Because there should be something new happening in our lives daily. If you’re a business person, start binging on established business people’s teachings , find out the how’s then apply. I am making a vow to myself that I cannot be small any longer. Greatness is not an importation. Greatness is a decision and then it is empowered by the Spirit of God.

Okay now, l hope we are going to use that little information. Our chilled Thursdays will now be interactive. Let’s update each other as a way of accountability on what we’re currently reading , listening to or studying. That way you know you are not only accountable but also doing what you ought to do when you should do it . I will start, this week I’m locking in on DR Myles Munroe teachings and I am also studying my course. I intend to be done with the paperwork I am currently going through by tomorrow morning.

Ohh andddddd to my book worms; Here’s a book

Categories
The Overcoming Believer

Worship Wednesday

The true definition of worship in the English dictionary: the feeling or expression of reverence and adoration for a deity. Hebrew worship means: worship, bend, prostrate oneself, adore.

Worship can shift your mindset and change your perspective of the world, of yourself, of others and even of GOD. Worship can push you into your destiny and cleanse you of your past. Personally, worship refreshes me. Like a cold shower on a very hot day or fresh breeze after rainfall. Worship is my resting place. My emotions stop spiralling. My mind stops pacing. My heart beats normally in the presence of the Everlasting God. Worship heals wounds and breaks generational curses. Worship does more than what a painkiller does when you have a bomb of a migraine , worship is surgery. You find healing , deliverance, restoration in worship. Worship, lets you hear God and lets God hear you. Worship tells God you’re grateful for winning and even more grateful that you’re alive to worship. There’s so much we could say but why not use all that excitement by actually worshipping today.

Mercy Chinwo - Confidence (Official Video)
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Categories
The Overcoming Believer

Leah [3

“And Jacob did so. He finished the week with Leah, and then Laban gave him his daughter Rachel to be his wife. Jacob made love to Rachel also, and his love for Rachel was greater than his love for Leah. And he worked for Laban another seven years. When the Lord saw that Leah was not loved, he enabled her to conceive, but Rachel remained childless.”
‭‭Genesis‬ ‭29‬:‭28‬, ‭30‬-‭31‬ ‭NIV‬‬

Hey family. ❤️

I tried to get a picture that could be close to how the Bible describes Leah 😂 . The Bible continues to say Jacob stayed with Leah for seven days. He didn’t chase her away or do away with her but she was in a place where she was unwanted. I don’t know if you’ve visited someone and after a day you know it’s time to go home. They didn’t ask you to leave BUT the atmosphere is screaming “Sir/Madam you’ve overstayed your welcome.” 😂. Anyhooo, Jacob proceeds to marry Rachel too then the bible says even The Lord saw that Leah was not loved. Can you imagine?! Leah. It means she was not even liked to say the least. God knows and He can see these things. That you have never been really loved, not by family, friends or a “lover” , God is aware!!

Jacob’s love for Rachel vs his resentful indifference to Leah. To comfort her, the Lord causes her to become pregnant, while the favoured, more beautiful, and younger Rachel remains childless. The word “hate” in this context means “to love less.” It simply means that Jacob continued to love Rachel MORE THAN he loved Leah. God’s compassion on Leah is touching. Even when her husband wasn’t, and her sister wasn’t , God was good to her. I have never been married but I can imagine how it would feel to know the man I married does not love me. You share a bed. You live together. You even eat together but there’s no devotion or dedication from someone who is your spouse. That must be heartbreaking. Women desire affection. As a matter of fact they need it. Leah’s needs were a wish that she saw being fulfilled in Rachel’s life. The same man giving different treatment to both women because he loves the other. Men know who they love and they will treat her better. Women know who they love and they will go all out for them. Don’t be fooled. People know what they want.

Let me encourage an abandoned woman by saying For your Maker is your husband, the LORD of hosts is His name. (Isaiah 54:5) Husbands are responsible to care for their wives. Yet when they do not, God can meet the needs of a hurting wife, needs that may be neglected by the husband. Yes they left you with kids and you have no idea how you will make it, God will take care of you. Yes the spouse neglected your needs and treated you like you don’t even exist , God is aware! The problem is when we embrace the identity of rejection and start to reject ourselves or to think less of ourselves.

The Lord saw. That part just made me smile. The Lord sees how people treat you. God is not sleepy or asleep. He saw the misery of Leah being locked into a loveless relationship. God desires for us to be loved. For a man to love his wife. For a woman to love her family. Any family that has no love is a dysfunctional family and many will eventually be affected. To the single people waiting to be loved by a lady or gentleman, l wanna say to you, God already loves you. While you wait know that you are already loved and chosen. The person coming into your life is not coming to introduce love to you or to teach you what is strange. They’re coming as an extension of Gods love to you.

You may have met a couple of Jacob’s who made you question humanity. Made you question your worthiness. Made you look in the mirror and see nothing even when you’re looking at Gods special possession. You may have met women who wasted your time like Delilah. Lying about their feelings because their actions revealed something else. Maybe you even gave them your body thinking it will make things better but nothing changed. You are already loved by your Abba. Love is not Vanessa. Love is not Mbali. I will tell you who love is – GOD.

Let this be a constant reminder;

And God saw.